It started off with a Times crossword in the sunshine. 2pm heralded the Call of Kumala. We never said we were rich
Skip to 3pm and the Battersea Darlings are 2 bottles better off. Joined by a Lavender Hill Lovie. X factor to follow, sorry to say that no one recollects Kelly and Tulisa's musings on the state of the music industry. Roll on 10pm and we are dancing on chairs with people we have never met and can barely see. 12 Jagermeisters each later and the world is a better place. Darling#1 leaves to meet Enduring Love (more to follow in later posts but safe to say Enduring Love does not equal Enduring Relationship).
Jump to Sunday Morning. Darling #1 walks in to front room (Enduring Love constitutes one night at least). Cue introduction to random man #1 (RM#1) (random man #2 leaves after a swift indescretion involving rear entry). Darling#2 in state of shock. Given manners are free, the Battersea Darlings and Lavender Hill Lovie, plus RM#1 head off to super chic Le Pot Lyonnais on Queenstown Road. Bloody Mary's and an invite to the church @Clapham Grand. Who can resist. When in Rome....
Fast forward, 5pm, rain drenched, saturated (that's alcohol not the rain) and Darling#1 is on the hunt for more booze at a local bar. Darling#2 is on the hunt for locals to buy her alcohol after the local Sainsbury's has tried to up the tone by refusing to serve her.
The punch line?
Rm#1 is an £85 an hour male escort and Detective Constable who buys drugs undercover. What else. Lucky we have insider information on Mafia run Gelaterias (more on that in later posts).
AA helpline googled.
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