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Thursday 20 October 2011

The Long Weekend..

Given all the birthday celebrating and late nights sponsored by Majestic Wine, the Battersea Darlings decided they should treat themselves to a long weekend, after pin holes eyes are hardly no 1  on Mr Right's wish list.

Plans were to pamper, beautify and chill out, but as the famous saying goes "best laid plans".....What the weekend really consisted of was copious amounts of wine, food and Ab Fab! That said, every cloud has a silver lining and if anything, after watching two series of Absolutely Fabulous the Battersea Darlings decided their life was tame in comparison and so in homage to  Edina and Patsy decided to head out for a "ladies lunch".

After doing what Edina and Patsy do best, (a wine and tapas filled lunch at The River Cafe) the Darlings headed to Canary Wharf to check out the bankers and their flexible friends.  After a few bars and not much success in terms of rich young men (sugar daddies a plenty) the Darlings headed to Covent Garden to meet their friend and catch up over some Moule Frites at Belgo's.


However said friend was a no show and, in a frankly odd turn of events, The Darlings ended up dining with her friends aka complete strangers. Lucky we're the sort to get stuck in. On the plus side these friends were also all male and rather charming. Cue an on-the-decision to create a Debate Club to invite them to... as you do...

Once again, every cloud....

Wednesday 19 October 2011

Belated Birthday Blog

Apologies for the belated blog but celebrating a Darling’s 30th is no mean feat and even harder to recover from, particularly when extended over two celebrations and a mid week visit to Movida.

Thursday 6 October 2011

Take me out… or not.

Last night, the Battersea Darlings both set out on first dates in a bid to meet the man of their dreams. Or if that didn’t work our a free feed.

Darling#1 stuck to what she knows best with a trip to Battersea Rise in store for her rather perturbing date. Having just made it back in time from Gatwick, #1 was alarmed to discover the date had no idea where to go when suggestion Clapham Junction as a meeting point. Cue a trip to The Establishment and a delicious dinner of sea bream for the lady and the roast lamb for the (not so gentle) man. The date in question had been met in Aquum as a result of the previous weekend’s escapades. Not the ideal venue to find a man but a date’s a date. Whilst sufficiently adoring of Darling#1, the look of horror on his face when he found out current reading material was David Copperfield and his constant fawning interspersed with ‘babe’ and ‘honey’ was not to Darling#1’s satisfaction. Probably didn’t help matters that Darling#1 repeatedly flirted with the waiter (cannot recommend the service highly enough!) … well When in Rome

That said, he’s a broker with a delightfully large balance so second date is more thank likely on the cards.

Battersea Darling #2 being the more adventurous of the two, opted for a trip to Shoreditch with her mystery Blind Date. Schlepping across London to arrive late and sweaty was perhaps not the ideal start but drinks at All Star Lanes at
Brick Lane
soon dispersed the tension (and the sweat).

Blind Date had laid down the gauntlet with a challenge to see who could discover the quirkiest bar. First up, The Breakfast Club. Led through a Smeg fridge to an underground bar where entry was gained by mentioning ‘the major’ to the obliging chap at the bar. Tres fun but the real winner was Callooh Callay for a Narnia style experience with entry through a wardrobe. (Note to Self, Battersea Darlings must transform front door… thinking telephone box?).

Despite the free drinks, Blind Date walked like Phil Mitchell… nice try Phil but we’re more a Grant fan.

Tuesday 27 September 2011

Live in dreams Sunday Girl

As one can imagine, Sunday saw a continuation of the weekend theme, which was if you haven’t already guessed getting absolutely trollied and consuming vats of wine.

After a rather slow start to the day consisting of mostly trying to trace the previous night’s movements and the missing honorary Darling, the Battersea Darlings met North London Lush at The Victoria so that she could retrieve her belongings and the darlings could concentrate on what they do best: drinking.

After a few cheeky bottles on an unlined stomach Darling#1 made a wise decision to invest in one of The Victoria's roasts before venturing to Lavender Hill to continue the binge and try out Battersea Music and Mess hall.  With 50% off food and a chance to try out the new kitchen, it seemed an opportunity not to be missed. Having worked up quite the appetite Darling#2 was looking forward to some food and trying out this new venue much to the Darlings dismay the kitchen was closed.  Disappointing to say the least.  However the interior and ambiance was quirky yet elegant and much preferable to the previous Walkabout. Add the fact that they didn't have wine glasses so we were requested to drink out of champagne flutes, well when in Rome.......

Now a blog by us would not be complete without a small love life update. Darling#1’s Enduring Love had yet to return the mandatory drunken calls and texts. A swift voicemail was left followed by deletion of number. This was only remembered Monday morning when Enduring Love texted to say he had left his phone at a friend’s for the weekend. Embarrassing, much?

Darling#2 meanwhile had taken swift vengeance on Mr Never Called After First Date. Multiple abusive texts later and he is still to respond. Still, no deletion as a friend of Facebook so it can’t all be bad!

What with the combination of no food and three bottles of wine Darling#2 was struggling to keep her eyes open and having given the liver a good old battering, the Darlings  ventured to Mien Tay for some delicious food (its one of our Battersea favourites) and of course some more liquid gold, that goes without saying, non?  The other diners were in for a treat, what with Darling#1 interrupting two diners intimate meal with her take on their conversation and Darling#2 spilling her prawn crackers all over them and the floor.....

 No alcohol to be imbibed on Monday. FACT.

Monday 26 September 2011

Battersea Darlings hit up Fez Club


Darling#2 was very much looking forward to the big blow out that she had planned with university friends…..once she got over Friday night’s hangover that was.  That said, there’s nothing like a bit of retail therapy on the King's Road to get rid of afore mentioned hangover.  A number of purchases made by both Battersea Darlings and all in all a successful trip, apart from Darling#1's lack of party dress for the impending 30th. More on this to come in later blogs. Venue booked, wine order negotiated, dress suggestions welcome!

Roll on wine o'clock, and a lovely dinner (Darling#1 was particularly pleased to have not contracted food poisoning unlike the last time Darling#2 pretended she was Delia Smith). First bottle of red was sunk upon the arrival of Honorary Battersea Darling Shepherd’s Bush Sheila. This moved rapidly on to some Blossom Hill with the arrival of Honorary Battersea Darling 2, North London Lush,  followed up with some vodka, nothing like mixing your drinks on a night out. Party dresses donned and suitably glammed up the Battersea Darlings, Shepherd’s Bush Sheila and North London Lush headed to Fez Club in Putney for a night of drunken dancing and hazy memories. How pleased we were to discover a wealth of photographic evidence the next day.

As with all good nights, Darling#2 and Shepherd’s Bush Sheila ended theirs in the local kebab shop at 5am in the morning (we shan’t elaborate but it involved a row and hidden chicken nuggets); North London Lush had as usual gone AWOL, (why change the habit of a lifetime) and had made her way to Tottenham Court Road. Goodness knows what time Darling#1 made it home. Nothing like a drunken tour of London on a Saturday night, especially when you can't remember it and have to piece your whereabouts together the next  morning  through the use of receipts and bus tickets.

All in all another amazing evening out with the Battersea Darlings.
Ah, Friday night and the chance to stay in, relax with some food and a film. For most people anyway.

For the Battersea Darlings, a quiet night in resulted in 2 bottles of Sauvignon Blanc swiftly polished off, with a chicken salad (we have figures to watch after all watch increase judging by the calorie content of wine).

Cue another two bottles of red being put to rest (if nothing else, we do significantly contribute to the recycling of glass).

Most people would have called it a night there and then. Not us. Darling#1 and Darling#2 donned flasher macs and stalked off to the closest offie. Cue Darling#2 yelling out to the charming chap in the shop Whass yer best deal?? which, apart from being hugely unnecessary as the shop makes our cupboard under the stairs look roomy, was mightily embarrassing for refined Darling#1.

Luckily, once back we discovered a classic Trevor Nelson compilation album that featured not one but two Craig David gems. What more could two girls need to dance along to whilst consuming that all important fifth bottle.

It all gets a bit hazy from there on in

Suffice to say that when the Battersea Darlings turned on the sound system next morning, they were greeted with Backstreets Back. Alright?

Friday 23 September 2011

Getting Quizzical

Darling#2's week seems to only be getting better, following on from the hair disaster earlier in the week, now compounded by a trapped nerve in her right arm, which also happens to be her drinking arm..... Clearly this is not ideal for her planned weekend activities of partying with uni friends at Putney Fez but one shall persevere, especially as if anything can dull such a pain it would be the consumption of copious amounts of alcohol.
 
With that in mind and with all of the managers out of the office, a boozy pub lunch in planned for this afternoon, purely for medicinal purposes, well they do say, when the cat's away......
 
Darling#1 in the meantime continued her quest to resurrect her lovelife. Having given up on Enduring Love, Darling#1 is now pursuing a Flash in the Pan. Luckily, The One That Never Was bbm'd conveniently with a date now set up for next week (catch up - a flirtation nearly a year ago now that never quite took off... he is terribly good looking though...) So far so good on the quest front.
 
Last night saw the arrival of the much anticipated Party Superstore quiz at The Victoria, in aid of the charity Street Kids Rescue.  The Battersea Darlings managed to round up a team of five including Lavender Hill Lovie, which grew to six when we recruited a random stranger. Said stranger was quite the recruit spending most of the evening on her I-phone googling answers - no one said we couldn't use our initiative (read cheating) to win......
 
As one can imagine and only hope, many bottles of wine were consumed, fuel for the brain obviously! A number of entertaining challenges ensued, including limbo, playdo modelling and blind taste testing.  However, despite using our initiative to help us claim 1st position and a bar tab we still only came fourth, that said much better than our performance on Sunday. 
 
The evening ended back at the Darlings apartment with a couple drunken friends.  Having adopted the rule "Eating is Cheating" there was much need for food, in the form of multiple bacon sandwiches but the night was still young and so ensued dancing on the coffee tables with copious amounts of wine....After all Thursday is the new Friday.
 
The result: A brilliant night had by all and a matching Friday morning hangover . Darling#1 left the house with eyeliner on just the one eye. Not rocking a new trend, just the result of too much plonk... oh dear.
 
Roll on the weekend!